How To Have Empathy During Your Divorce
The divorce process is often long, harrowing, and full of unique challenges for all family members involved. Whether you have a family together, multiple assets, or just are letting go of someone you thought you would spend your life with, the complexities of divorce can take their toll and bring out bad behavior in good people. While it can be easy to only think about only your own feelings in the divorce proceedings, it's in the best interest of everyone involved to remember the golden rule: treat others the way you want to be treated. Not only will it help make this difficult time easier, but it will bring peace of mind as you navigate this new life experience.
Practice Active Listening
Active listening means really taking the time to stop, listen, and hear what the other person is saying. This will help you step into the other person's shoes and truly see where they are coming from. Being present shows that you care about each other as former partners and human beings and will lead to mutual understanding, easier conflict resolution, and happier post-divorce relationship satisfaction—especially if you have children together and will need to continue being in each other's lives.
Create A Support Group
Whether it's answering emails from your divorce lawyer, interviewing family lawyers, navigating social issues, and the emotional impact of such a massive life change, it's easy to feel overwhelmed and full of negative feelings. As we know, men are less likely to seek help from others when it comes to mental illness, emotional upheaval, and domestic violence. It is vital to surround yourself with family and friends who will you support through such an emotional experience. The people who love you want to be there for you, all you have to do is open the door so they can walk through it.
But, you can do even more to combat the negative emotions that will arise during this time. This is a perfect time to start exploring professional counseling services like a one-on-one therapist or support group. Licensed professionals will be able to help you navigate the myriad of emotions you're feeling while providing healthy coping mechanisms and a safe space to turn to. If this is your first time searching for a therapist, PsychologyToday.com is a reputable and easy resource to help you find what you're looking for.
Consider a Divorce Mediator
Sometimes it can be difficult to reach a neutral emotional level when going through divorce. Whether harsh words are being thrown around, someone is stonewalling the divorce proceedings, or the two of your just can't seem to communicate in an effective manner, it may be time to consider a mediator. A divorce mediator, I recommend Collaborative Practice of California, is different from a divorce lawyer, but they can work in tandem or your divorce lawyer may be able to recommend a mediator that will work for the two of you. The mediator is hired by and reports to both members of a divorce and plays the critical role of acting as a bridge between the two parties so that you can expedite the divorce experience and get to a brighter future faster.
Move Out ASAP
Moving out of a shared home after a divorce can significantly facilitate emotional healing and the development of empathy. A fresh living environment allows one to reflect on past experiences from a new perspective, fostering a deeper understanding of both personal needs and the dynamics of previous relationships. This transition often leads to opportunities for redesigning one's living space to better align with individual preferences and emotional states. Let Rooted Interiors help and be instrumental in this process! I can help to create a home that not only comforts but also reflects one’s renewed sense of self and lifestyle.
Practicing cognitive empathy for yourself and your former spouse will not only bring you a long way in understanding where each other is coming from but will be an invaluable skill as you navigate life changes like being a single parent or future romantic relationships. Remember that while your divorce is part of your life, it does not have to define your life.